European childrens books

I was reading to Daniel last night when putting him down for bed. He has quite a selection of books in his room. I don't even know where we got them all. I let him pick out what ever book he wants me to read to him. Sometimes he chooses Dr Seuss, sometimes a Disney book like Cars or Scooby Doo, even Veggie Tales.

Last night he handed me a book that I vetoed after seeing page 7. Then he handed me another right after that I again had to veto after seeing page 9.

I was totally flabbergasted, I thought to myself "this is a children's book?" Who in the world would put something like that in a children's book!!? I found that they were published in Great Britain. Ok, now that makes a little more sense, this coming from a country that gives us nursery rhymes like "ring around the rosy" - a rhyme about the great plague of Europe, where Iron Maiden isn't a rock group and the term "medieval" was coined.

They have some sick concept of what constitutes a childrens story!

To illustrate: here are a couple of the pictures that led me to confiscate the book. This book is a pop out book - cute, huh? until you see this!!! Some big ugly troll is grinding some poor hapless victim to death against a sharpening stone.... they even made it so you can turn the stone your self, isn't that fun!?



Right below the grinding stone, 3 trolls are playing catch with another hapless victim who they set on fire and who is now burning to death for their amusement. Hello - HE'S ON FIRE!! The author and publisher must have been thinking, what are we going to with the page of 3 naked Trolls torturing a guy to death by fire? - hey - lets put it in a childrens book!




The next page of this same "pop out" book shows another guy being forced to dance while chained to a stake and another guy forced to run on a treadmill for hours at a time. Turn the wheel, you can make him run for hours too!

This next book features a creature who they say is the "Christmas Goat" but I say missed his role in one of those SAW horror movies (which I never intend to ever see). Look at the kids in the picture scampering under the table as fast as they can. I think that says it all. I think they both wet themselves too. If that thing came in my front door I probably would.



If that's what kids see when they sit on Santa's lap, then I understand why they're terrified out of their little minds! (Christmas goat!?? - seriously, who's bright idea was that?)

I think for now I'll just stick with Dr Seuss and Scooby Doo.